and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
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This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
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You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
How does one acquire holy water?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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