So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
