Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
