she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
