No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize