Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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