Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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