I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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