My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
is wine microwaveable?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
so much tequila, so little girl.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
