she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
