I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
