Define "chronic" masturbator.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
