This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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