Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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