i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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