I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
