He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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