Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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