I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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