I swear she didn't look like that last week.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize