I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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