Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
