That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
