Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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