Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I'm bleeding and have questions
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize