I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌