let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
