my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
