I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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