Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
