After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
