Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
