she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
