It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
