Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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