Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.