I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
There's always time for handjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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