no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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