If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
