She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
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