That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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