Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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