I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
