they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
