I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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