let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'm just crazy horny about you
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
