I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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