i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize