he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Randomize