I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
