Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better not be in your backpack
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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