honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize